23.07.20
내가 어떤 감정으로부터 도망치고 싶을 때 마다 내 생각을 방해해줄 수 있는 케이팝을 듣는구나. 순간순간 필요할 때는 괜찮지만 없으면 안될 것 처럼 찾게 된다면, 그 때는 잠깐 앉아서 내가 어느 감정으로부터 도망가려하는지 찬찬히 생각해봐야 하는 것 같다. 메기가 자기 작업에 대한 레퍼런스를 숨기려 했을 때 안나는 나는 저런 식으로 작업하거나 살고 싶지않다고 나한테 이야기 했을 때, 동시에 메기와 안나에게 공감이 갔다. 하지만 그 때 당시에는 나도 마찬가지로 앞으로 나아가는, 그리고 특히나 그 시기에 작업이란 것 자체에 내 자신의 아이덴티티나 가치에 투영시키고 있었던 (솔직히 아직도 그러는 느낌이 없지 않아 있다) 때 였었고 작업 한다는 것에 대해 엄청나게 프로텍티브한 상태이기도 했기 때문에 메기한테 좀 더 마음이 동했던거 같다. 지금에서야 그 때 나랑 메기를 동일시하며 느낀 감정과 안나에게 받은 상처...를 프로세싱 하고있다. 하이디 프룸이라는 유튜버가, 어떤 감정이 날 너무 불편하게 만들어서 그 감정에서 도망가려 할 때 (예를 들어 유튜브를 4시간 동안 본다거나, 어떤 것에 집착한다던가 등의 이유) 참을 수 없이 날 numbing 하고 싶다면 it's okay to allow yourself to numb at that moment. However, you must promise myself that I will comeback to that uncomfortable feelings that I am trying to runaway from. From now on, I will start to track the feelings that I have averse reaction towards and get urge to runaway. If I at least start to write them down, I will be able to talk about them with Crystal or just process it by my own. At least I am not running away from the feelings of negativities. I won't let my inner child stay stagnent with all these bottled up feelings of shame and fear to the point where she is frozen to make any actions. I will take care of her even though she sometimes make mistakes. I will get back to her and sit with her shame and fear. Give her big hug and tell her that it's okay to make mistakes. What's important is to break a pattern and realize that we can make an action that allows us to behave and show up in the world that is aligned with our ownself. Okay, feelings I am currently trying to runaway from:
fear of abandonment by Matias
shame from the social reactions at Kaje dinner
anger or pain from the conversation with Anna about Maggie
fear of not being able to make good enough show for LA in january
fear of losing hair and continuing to struggle with acne (body image)
Okay. These are some topics that I have been trying to runaway from. But here I am. Sitting down and writing those out. I will tackle them one by one. Maybe not right now. But I'm grateful that I at least identified these. I will talk about them with Crystal. Probably talk to Anna about the conversation. Okay, I feel lot better now. I just put new acne treatment. My acne will go away slowly. I will simplify my routine to morning: cerave cleanser - soonjung toner - cicalfalt & night: lcp cleanser - soonjung toner - cerave lotion - cerave lotion + adapalne - cicalfalt. Occasional niacinamide, hyaluronic, vit c serums once my pimples disappear. When my skin is inflamed and irritated, I have steroid cream and tea tree modeling mask so i can do those.